The Night before Surgery

The time between diagnosis and your operation (if you are scheduled for one), is normally very short and you can be whisked away within 12-24 hours. Most of you will find that outwardly, you are calm and together and in numb shock inside.You will have bouts of crying which come on suddenly especially when you are with loved ones and friends, who are offering you love and support.You may find that your loved one is battling more than you emotionally and may even display denial at the diagnosis. Often a spouse will wait until post-op and the diagnosis is confirmed surgically, before coming to terms with the news.He or she may only start talking about it at this stage.This is a common form of denial and is a perfectly normal response.Allow them their time too.
The night before the operation will be a jumble of questions and answers. try and relax as much as possible and take a painkiller or sedative if necessary. Take one day at a time - all your questions, hopes and doubts will be answered in due course.Try not to think too far ahead and concentrate on the moment. And remember, from the time of you operation, you are already on the road to recovery, albeit a long and rocky one...but you're one step closer.
If you find yourself pacing up and down in the wee hours of the morning prior to surgery, do whatever it takes to relax your mind, even if it means waking your spouse up for a rampant love session! Watch the dawn breaking and revel in the beauty of the world...smell it, taste it, feel it.
The trip to the hospital may be a little nerve wracking for you but you will find yourself in control at this time. You tend to talk about day to day stuff which is great as it gives you a sense of normality. The admittance to the ward is normally a routine procedure but a word of warning - if you share a ward and share your diagnosis with other patients, be prepare to hear some bizarre responses as people are ignorant and this may upset your delicate balance!
Carefully choose who you would like to partner you to the hospital and be with you in the ward... extended family members tend to become overpowering in their quest to help. You are in control and it is your choice to call the shots at all times. Stand firm in what you want and how you want it done.Your spouse can exercise a little control so that he feels empowered and able to assist.
Day one post-op, results from surgery,blood tests, biopsy results etc will be complete and your doctor will come in and discuss them with you.This is a roller coaster of a day as the effects of the anaesthetic and surgery takes their toll. You may feel weepy and unsure of the future.Remember to take one day at a time and all these emotions are normal and acceptable.Hearing a definite confirmation of the grade and type of cancer and stage it is at, is mind boggling even for the strongest person. Allow those emotions to flow. Your spouse may have turned a corner emotionally and is suddenly filled with positive aspects on how you will fight this and will be encouraging you.This is a good thing but at some stage, you need to address the negative emotions as well as this is a very important part of your journey towards a new future.